Enjoy the Sunday

When did MTV jump the shark?

My theory: there was a time when the media giant served a purpose. Not that it was ever - contrary to the hoopla - an exceedingly lofty objective, but at least it gave the kids their rock 'n' roll.

Early on, the VJs were geeky, awkward, star-struck fans and the station enjoyed the cachet of being a modestly successful culture-purveyor and influence-peddler.

Somewhere along the way, the little network that could began to believe its own hype and take itself way too seriously. It took ill-advised forays into political advocacy and began to relegate various genres to purgatorial time-slots apparently scheduled to limit, rather than expand, a particular music's fan base. When was Headbanger's Ball on anyway? Those that already felt marginalized by their tastes became more so thanks to this marketing apartheid.

So the self-styled progressive institution that brought Aerosmith & Run-DMC together on the same stage tucked everyone away into their respective corners, abandoned and forgotten. But somewhere in the darkness, those with rebellious thoughts about miscegenation grew angry, alienated beyond all good sense, hatching abortive concepts like "Limp Bizkit" and "Kid Rock." Hey, MTV, next time you try to kill a movement, make sure it's dead. Save us villagers the trouble of lighting our torches and dusting off our pitchforks. We won't be able to get any farming done if we're busy staving off the Children of the KoЯn.

But if you really want to identify the point of no return, the year was 1992. That was when The Real World debuted. And - all cards face-up - I was one of its early boosters. Who has discriminating taste in 8th grade? Certainly not me. And certainly not any of the other millions who watched it, encouraged it, allowed it to take root, muscling out the traditional programming. Three years later, Jenny McCarthy became co-host of Singled Out. A "courageous" move, the network execs said, putting a former Playboy model in their lineup. Yeah, bravo, guys. Congratulations on betting that America would embrace a blonde bombshell. Also, thanks for setting the unattainable standard for female beauty even higher. The anorexic girls in my class owe you one.

I don't blame MTV for creating reality t.v. The conceit has been around since the beginning of television. I do however blame it for embracing the trend so callously, for making celebrity so cheap and available. For decrying the dangers of plastic surgery on Monday's episode of True Life while re-running I Want a Famous Face on Tuesday. For never owning up to its architectural responsibility for the vapid, amateurish, Warholian wasteland of starfucking in which we now live. At least when it was Michael Jackson on the screen you could say - with healthy reassurance - "yeah, he's famous, but I bet his home life is hectic." Now it's our dysfunction on display. Every blemish in high-def relief. Why should the professionals be the only ones able to self-destruct on air? "Reality" killed the video stars.

Here's a throwback to simpler times, when the Dickerson clan would come back from church on Sunday, watch You Can't Do That on Television on Nickelodeon and then a little MTV to round out the afternoon.