When the Universe Clicks into Place

Studying the arms race and brinkmanship in class this week. At the end of a lecture on air raid drills and bomb shelters, I showed the class "Duck & Cover." Predictably, they scoffed at its alarmist directives: "We must be ready everyday - all the time - to do the right thing if the atomic bomb explodes." They're just so much cooler, so much tougher than their predecessors. Modern teenagers aren't susceptible, it seems, to quaint problems like "nuclear paranoia."

And then, to my delight, our principal announced over the loudspeaker that we were going into a "lockdown drill" - all the better to prepare for a school shooting, you know. Sometimes the universe conspires in your favor. I think it's called "pronoia." You can't plan a lesson that good.

Ron Paul: The Game

First Mario Kart drops on the Wii this month and now Ron Paul has transformed into a CGI character:



Hell, I'd play that. Apparently there are bonus levels where you can return the U.S. to the gold standard and pull us out of the U.N. Sorry, gamers. Paul doesn't believe in cheat codes.

Who's Jesse Owens?

Moments like this - posted on The Daily Dish last night - leave me fantasizing about becoming a superhero who responds to emergencies of historical illiteracy.

My base would be carved into a mountain of books somewhere in the stacks of an obscure archive. I'd have an old-timey, station-to-station telephone that would ring whensoever society's understanding of history was being threatened.

Commissioner Kearns Goodwin: "We need your help, NuClio!"

NuClio: "What's wrong? Are they trying to pass new standards for social studies in No Child Left Behind?"

Commissioner Kearns Goodwin: "Even worse. The Decider is giving a press conference about his 'legacy.'"

NuClio: "I'll be there in good time. Just let me prep a little research."